#TRIGGERWarning: Explicit & possibly upsetting content about #Rape
NOTE: I edited this on February 12th, 2015,
taking out the link to sign the petition at change.org.
I am happy to report that the management at Heinz Hall
DID THE RIGHT THING
and Bill Cosby's appearance has been canceled. Amen.
(Original post: 2015)
I understand why the Heinz Hall Management in Pittsburgh is reluctant to postpone the Bill Cosby appearance. It’s about the money. It could be very expensive to pay the promoter and Bill Cosby to postpone.
I understand it even though I still think they should do the right thing and postpone.
Postpone until Bill Cosby has addressed the allegations.
Himself. Not through his lawyers. (If he is innocent, why is it so difficult to say so?)
However, what I don’t understand is some of the reactions to the women who have accused Bill Cosby of rape and/or assault. Although many women and men have supported them, I do not understand the people who haven't.
I especially do not understand women not supporting women.
As an advocate for women, this breaks my heart.
Why do they assume the women are lying? Why would they assume that Bill Cosby is innocent of the accusations?
I do want to say here, that many, many women have come forward to say they believe the women; however, we need more women supporting women.
He is not Dr. Huxtable.
That was a character he played on television.
I am beginning to think that people do not fully grasp what rape is.
It is not the equivalent of someone grabbing a purse from someone else and running away. Yes, that is a crime and upsetting, but rape is something more.
Rape is not the caresses of a lover. Rape is violent. Rape is an attempt to hurt and humiliate, using sex as the weapon. Someone is shoving a penis and/or other objects into the orifices of your body
without your consent.
It is a violent, life-threatening act that hurts and often damages internal organs.
It is someone brutally handling and touching you in places that you did not give them permission to touch.
It is someone violently hitting and thrusting.
It is a violation of your body and your soul.
Now we add in the drug accusations. So not only was Bill Cosby raping.
He drugged them so they weren’t even conscious during the assaults. This is sick.
After the assaults, these women did not come forward right away. Many were confused about what happened, which is a normal reaction to having been drugged. The women were frightened, shocked, ashamed and intimidated. These are all normal reactions to an assault.
People ask why did they wait until now?
Some of their memories were confusing because of the drugs.
Many believed that they were his only victim and that no one would believe them.
And, let’s take a look at the reactions that they have gotten.
Disbelief, disgust, name calling…exactly what may have stopped them
from speaking out at the time.
This is the only crime where the victim is blamed. She shouldn’t have gone to his room, she shouldn’t have taken the pill, she shouldn’t have….
How about HE SHOULDN’T HAVE RAPED HER?
Over 30 allegations of assault at this point.
False accusations of rape are very rare. The number of people who lie about assaulting other people is very high.
(The following paragraph is from Sociology of Rape, University of Minnesota Duluth)
Not only are victims reluctant to discuss their assaults but many succeed in totally blocking the assault from conscious memory. However, the trauma remains and may come to the surface at another crisis or when the opportunity to discuss it with a sympathetic person arises. (Copyright: © 2001, John Hamlin, Last Modified: Thursday, 03-Mar-2005 14:12:13 CST)
As women started to come forward, other victims realized that they were not alone. He had assaulted others in the same way.
Let’s look at some facts about rape.
• 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually assaulted by the age of 18 • Every two minutes in the United States, someone is sexually assaulted • 1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed rape; 2.8 % attempted rape) • 60% of sexual assaults are not reported to the police and 97% of rapists will never spend a day in jail • Victims are also 3 times more likely to suffer from depression, 6 times more likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, and 4 times more likely to contemplate suicide. • Studies find that only 2-7% of rape claims are false
(Facts and Statistics are provided by RAINN)(www.rainn.org)
If we would support those who are hurt,
perhaps we could change some or all of those statistics.
What if it was someone close to you?
What if it were you?
The following list of hashtags has been updated, 2019
#Rape #rapistBillcosby #BillCosby #ibelievethewomen #rapistCosby #victimblaming #rapeculture #CosbyTour #RapeisnotFunny #DrHuxtable #liar #violent #drugging #rapist #assault #sexualassault #UsingPower #PowerfulMen #metoo #keepingsecrets #abuse #CosbyinPrison #PTSD #victims #CosbyVictims #AndreaConstand #accusations #falseaccusations #consent #NO #Timesup #IbelievetheWomen #domesticviolence #rapists #daterape #daterapedrugs #Unabletoconsent #violenceagainstwomen #attemptedrape #selfdefense #menwhorape #survivors #survivor #Stopraping #stopviolence
Comments. Please scroll down to leave thoughts and comments
Jean Scott said "Frankly, I am no activist. But I am appalled at what happened when I casually mentioned that I knew that Bill Cosby had dosed and raped a girl way back when, and that I had believed her implicitly. It took her a lot of courage and therapy work just to speak with the other models from the talent agency. She only did it to warn the rest of us. I KNOW she was not lying, who the hell would ever make up such a thing, and, with your Mother standing by your side, relate to others the event?Okay, I’m on the defensive because when I said; yes, I know, this is true, I was JUMPED, on twitter, by what I thought were crazed Cosby supporters. Now I’m
thinking they’re all just one guy, putting out BOT accounts, probably being paid by Bill Cosby to do it. Good Gravy, the way I’m being attacked and seeing other attacked, is exactly WHY a teenager can’t deal, hello! They put it aside, and have a life. Then, decades later, all of the sudden you realize now you have the strength to deal with that festering splinter in your soul. You couldn’t do it then, as a young woman, you had no strength yet. But, take the
SAME woman, after four decades, hell, you’re a whole other person, and you have no fear. That’s why this is happening now.
And I’m SO PLEASED that there is this “Third Act,” for women, I didn’t know. I didn’t know you wake up at 60 and you’re a Wise Woman with Power. Betcha Bill Cosby didn’t know it would happen either, lol."
Diana responded with
"Jean, Thank you so much for commenting You are so right–the strength we have as we get older is amazing! I love being a Wise Woman with power and I so appreciate you taking the time to share like this!"
Danieella said "Diana – Thank you for standing up and shedding light on this situation. Your blog post shows people who may be “on the fence” about Bill Cosby a clearer way of seeing what is really going on. Thank you for standing up for these women and for showing the world that this is not welcome in our city!"
Diana responded with "Danieella, Thank you so much for writing and I truly appreciate the support!"
JoAnn Buttaro said "Thank you Diana, this post covers all the bases pertaining to date rape and sexual assault and needs to be said out loud and repeatedly."
Diana responded with "Thank you so much for writing! I know you are a survivor of date rape and I am glad that you feel I was accurate in my writing about a sensitive and terrible subject."