“Everyone lies in the ER.” That statement stayed in my head long after the fear, panic and state of emergency had lessened. It seems as if we all end up in an emergency room at some point in our lives, either as the person in agony, or the advocate for said person. We recently had two very serious emergencies which led to frantic rushing to emergency rooms. The first to a city hospital. The second to hospital closer to home. As afternoon passed into evening on the day of the

I see them in my night dreams, two sisters of mine. They are interwoven through my dream stories and sometimes their children are there. Often there are more children than I knew about and the dream story becomes about that. When I awaken, if I have time, I think about the dream, and wonder if the children represent all the events and tidbits I don’t know about in their lives anymore. It’s odd. I never thought, when I was younger, that I would be a person who doesn’t speak to

With the shutdown of the country came the shutdown of my writing. I have published exactly two blog posts and one magazine article since THE PANDEMIC. That is not a great amount. Everything else I start to write seems so trivial or else so horrible that it would take pages to delve into even one particular subject out of so many. Today, I opened a new document to make yet another attempt at creativity and inspiration, with perhaps a dash of wit. This is me, trying to write. I

I want to write something amazing, healing and thoughtful. I want my words to make you feel better about everything. I want to use magical phrases that will make your mind rest, stop your thoughts from spinning and dispel your fear and anxious feelings of uncertainty. But I don’t know which words I could use to accomplish that. We are at an anxiety level that many of us have never felt before. Our brains are on high alert all of the time. What the hell do we do with all the f

I am rewiring my brain. I am actively adding images to some of my memories to reflect my self love and my healing. One of my first memories of my mom’s reactions to gifts, was when I was five or six, running through the kitchen. I had a little route, from the living room, through the kitchen, toward the front door and into the living room again. Someone had taken me to the store to buy a gift for Mother’s Day or her birthday. I didn’t really understand what the tiny funny fig

Healthy, happy families, and they do exist, are not really worrying about the upcoming Holidays except to plan food, gifts and events. Although there may be some stress concerning budgeting, travel arrangements or amounts of this or that for meals, overall, they are anticipating the holidays with delight. They want to see relatives, and they look forward to catching up, laughing, visiting and exchanging ideas. Unhealthy families do not anticipate holidays with pleasure. Unhea

July I am flinging myself into my house. Not around the house. INTO the house. I am decluttering with an energy that is focused and frantic at the same time. Emotional turmoil has done me in. I did not have my defenses up. These last two years have taken their toll and I know I’m not the only one that feels this way. I am weary. I hate everyone. Even the people I love and respect out there. I am cranky. I load up stuff for the thrift store, filling my car, over and over. I

Is life at age 60 any different than life at age 59? Well, no, not really.... However, I have this number now. Sixty. It signifies old. Ok Maybe older, but c’mon, we’re all thinking, she is getting up there! So this is what I find. Knowing that I am this number, this 60, knowing that I have less time in front of me than behind me, makes me think about, really think about, how I am spending my time. In other words, I don’t have time to waste. With less time in front of me than

Forgiveness: My mantra for 2018. It’s time for me to forgive. I need to forgive other people and myself. I am going to move forward with this in the new year and free myself from carrying around all this heavy, heavy shit. I stopped eating all sweets in December. (I still cannot believe I made it through the holidays without eating cookies or candy! This has NEVER happened before.) I lost weight which is what I hoped would happen, but as I got lighter and felt I could move mo

Can people change? Recently a friend of mine re-hired an employee who hadn’t worked out when she hired her over twenty years ago. The woman swore she was more mature, had changed, was going to be a great employee. My friend was impressed with how she presented herself and though it had ended badly the last time, she gave her another chance. Months went by and it seemed to be working, and then it wasn’t. She failed to show up for work and well, one thing led to another, and my